Every couple has their own story worthy of a romantic comedy.
Perhaps they met in a cute way. Maybe they were friends for years before stumbling into a relationship. Some have whirlwind romances climaxing in an elaborate proposal.
All agonize over when to pop the question and how to answer it. Finally saying “yes” comes as a relief, and is an end to the worry, the concern and the first step in a lifetime together.
Little does the couple know, that was the easy part. Now they must plan their wedding, and things are about to get complicated.
Weddings — dresses, an officiant, a photographer and a myriad of other details — require careful planning, but so does the reception afterward.
For newly-engaged couples arranging their reception, the first step Das Dutchman Essenhaus Conference Center Manager Shannon Lee recommends is to pick a date. Settling on a date early will help guarantee a couple can have the wedding on their first-choice date.
“I will book a year or two out because the weekends are the first ones to go. So that is important to get a feel of when you want the date,” Lee said.
Lee has developed her expertise in the subject through helping organize the 15 to 20 wedding receptions Essenhaus, an Amish-style restaurant and conference center in Middlebury, hosts each year.
After selecting a date, Lee advises a couple should decide how many people to invite so they can decide on how large of a space to rent.
“You don't need a really accurate number, but it's good to have an idea so we can make sure everyone fits,” Lee said.
At that point, the bride and groom can also figure out if some of their guests will be coming from out of town. Then they will be able to decide how many hotel rooms to book in addition to an event space, and whether to reserve a honey-moon suite for themselves.
Some couples opt for outdoor receptions. Holding the celebration in the fresh air at a park or on the landscaped grounds of a place like Essenhaus adds to the festive atmosphere.
Rain or shine, weather can make or break the big day for an outdoor reception. Lee recommends renting a tent to protect from the elements and allow the party to go on.
What food to serve, entertainment to hire, space to rent, decorations to use: all of those questions involve money. Couples should decide on a budget, Lee said. Having a target is particularly important for picking the menu for the reception.
“It's good to have an idea of what you want to eat and price range that you can spend per person,” Lee said.
Larger venues often have several dinner options for events, from the food itself to whether it’s served buffet-style, family-style or as fixed plates.
Similar to most event spaces, after the couple has an idea of what they want, they should reserve the space on the date they want to hold their wedding.
At this point, the couple has a room filling up with people and food, but there is still plenty more they can add, including decorations.
“Then … the planning is really up to the bride because she chooses all the colors, if she wants colored napkins — there's so many other different variables,” Lee said.
The final step in planning the reception is to decide where everything fits in the hall or tent, and how it all comes together as a whole piece.
“Usually about a month or so before the reception I make an appointment with the bride and groom,” Lee said. “We make a room diagram so they know where they want everything in the room.”
Some couples can find their wedding day overwhelming. From the moment they wake up until the end of the reception, they will be surrounded by friends and family. Scheduling a brief respite from the chaos can be wise.
“A lot of the couples like to take a carriage ride before or after the reception to have a little alone time,” Lee said.
Overall, her philosophy is to try to accommodate the bridge, groom and whatever their dream reception involves so their Hollywood story can end exactly how they want it to.
“They bring in whatever they need. They have their party and their meal, and we send them on their happily ever after,” Lee said.
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